Mom smiled at his words of criticism but rarely contradicted, not quick or bold enough, to match wits with him" (77). Another symbolic illustration of suppression within Oates' family in "We were" is the apparent conflict that Bim experiences for his father. He tries to suppress both love and hate for his father, for expressing love would mean "weakness" on Bim's part, not to mention his fear of being rejected when he shows his love for his father. Bim's hate is also suppressed mainly for fear of retribution from his father. It is evident that as a child, Bim is limited to express his feelings -- thus, suppression operates as his way of not acknowledging and hiding the existence of feelings of love and hate, which, at the same time, protects him from feelings of hurt and embarrassment.

Oates illustrates these suppressions of love and hate through the image of a black stallion and the hitchhikers that the family had, for numerous times, failed to accommodate in their Packard. The black stallion is Bim's 'medium' through which he channels his frustration in life, especially in a difficult that he was going through as a thirteen-year-old: "...Bim saw so vividly a magnificent black stallion galloping by the roadside...he had to pinch himself to realize the stallion was not real; and no one else...could see it" (78-9). Hitchhikers also have a symbolic meaning in the story, since these hitchhikers represent the subjugated family, wherein each rejection signifies Dad's neglect for his family's sentiments and feelings. The family's eventual behavior against hitchhikers is an after-effect of Dad's neglect, wherein displacement takes place, wherein hate within the family is redirected towards their aversion to and avoidance of the hitchhikers.

In the second phase, two defense mechanisms emerge in Bim's personality. Reaction formation occurs as Bim learns to convert his love for his father to hate, thereby resulting to the dominant feeling of hate for Dad. This is symbolically illustrated by the shifts of

The control of the Packard from Dad to Mom to Bim demonstrates the control of the family from the father and eventually to Bim, wherein the former eventually shows his weak character as Bim's personality and resistance towards his father becomes stronger. Thus, through reaction formation, Bim had finally achieved resistance by showing indifference to his father, signifying his hate and disregard for him, in retaliation to his father's insensitive ways towards his family, when he was still a young and dominant man.
Displacement becomes Bim's ultimate "release" from all the suppression he had experienced as a child in his family. The implied killing of a hitchhiker at the last part of the story demonstrates resistance turned into action, a protest against his Dad's dominance. Implied within the act of killing the hitchhiker is the "killing" of the oppression that Bim felt as a child in his family. Oates demonstrates Bim's 'power' by showing him in control of a car ("borrowed from a roommate"), rejecting an approaching hitchhiker, and eventually (though accidentally) kills, and deserts him (the hitchhiker). In this instance, Bim redirects his anger and hate from his father to the hitchhiker, a finality that had satisfied Bim's desires, yet leaving him with a feeling of doubt and unease with the 'accomplishment' of this 'desire' (i.e., to retaliate and revenge against his father).