Date with Death in O’Connor and Oates
Flannery O'Connor in "A Good Man is Hard to Find" discusses the outcome and truth about life, death and religion. When I first read the story, I didn’t think much of it and was just surprised how it ended with the family being murdered. The story begins with the illustration of the family's relationship towards one another, their lack of respect for one another. The grandmother is portrayed as a manipulative and self-centered person. For example, the grandmother’s warning about the Misfit was not to help the family but to manipulate the family into doing what she wanted. She did not want to go to Florida: she wanted to go see her ancestral home somewhere else. She also brought the cat along, even though she was told not to—but it is understandable: the cat seems to be the only thing she cares about outside herself. Ironically, it is the cat that ends up on Bailey’s head, which causes him to flip the car.

Sadly, I felt the family didn’t seem like a happy family and wanted to exclude the grandmother out of the family vacation—mainly because they were all just as self-centered, each person focusing on himself—or, as in the case of the mother, hardly even there at all. I felt sorry for the grandmother mainly though, because I thought the reason they ignored was that she was old. But then June Star said, "She wouldn't stay at home for a million bucks…Afraid she'd miss something. She has to go everywhere we go." This gave me the impression that the grandmother must complain a lot, was probably judgmental and probably tried to tell everyone what to do all the time. I figured that could get old, and I understood the children’s attitude toward her.

With the family coming face to face with the Misfit, you see the actions and reactions of this family. I believe that Flannery O'Connor ended the story with a violent scene to awaken the reader by showing how a self-absorbed person reveals their true nature when they are faced with death. At the moment of death the grandmother finally empathized with another human being—the Misfit. She understood his pain, stopped thinking about her own self and suffering and reached out to touch him. But of course her empathy makes him recoil as though she were a snake. It is funny the way O’Connor describes the scene through the eyes of the characters as you are reading it—but I particularly like this ending: there is so much going on in it.

"A Good Man is hard to Find" by Flannery O'Connor and "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been" by Joyce Carol Oates both deliver a comparable message about the shocking nature of violence and internal conflicts of the characters within themselves. Both stories had male characters who proved to be effective in persuading their victims to follow them to their deaths and/or abduction. The actions of these predators taught the grandmother and Connie about their own errors at the end of the stories. That was what I really liked: you can be so horrible your whole life and then all at once it catches up with you and the ache you feel for these characters is so strong. It is certainly painful—it is so easy to see yourself in their shoes.

Connie from "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been” realized that her actions and behavior towards the people around her and the guys in her life was wrong. Being faced with the tragic circumstances of the situation—feeling powerless with the man on the other side of the screen door issuing threats against her family if she did not come out—she seemed so young, so sad, so pathetic in that moment, I could not help but feel sorry for her. She finally came to the conclusion that because of her careless behavior, she was about to face death and there was nothing she...…comparison to the grandmother, Connie in "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been" is a naive 15 year old girl who is constantly getting criticized by a jealous mother and is getting compared to her simple and dull older sister. As far as her father goes, he is never around. I think in order to fill that void of emptiness she needed to fill it with something else—so she tried to fill it with boys. She wears provocative clothing and tries to act more mature in order to get the attention from the older boys. She is rushing into adulthood before she is mature enough to even understand her actions and consequences.

Since Connie doesn’t fully understand her actions and is struggling with her adolescence, I think she is innocent. She caught attention of the wrong man that led to a horrible ordeal. When Arnold Friend showed up to Connie's house, he put her in a situation that she knew that there was no way out. She sacrificed herself and walked out with Arnold Friend, rather than risk the lives of her family.

Both of the characters from "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been" and "A Good Man is Hard to Find" come to face with death due to unfortunate events. The writers end both stories with the realization of internal conflict of the characters within themselves. The grandmother realized that she was selfish and a bad person, only when she was face to face with death. Connie realized that she was selfish with her behavior and when she came to face with evil, she needed her family. She risked herself just to make sure that her family was left unharmed. In O’Connor’s story the grandmother reaches out to touch the Misfit to try to save him, no longer even thinking of herself or her own life. In Oates’ story, Connie reaches out to Friend in a moment of self-sacrifice, giving herself up so that her family is not tortured by him.…