¶ … breathing meditation for 15 minutes in accordance with the principles and techniques described by both Seward (2015) and Stahl & Goldstein (2010), I enjoyed the process but it was challenging. My mind could not stand still. I thought a lot about the work I had to do that day, as well as some relationship problems that I had been having. Thinking about my work led to sensations like stress, anger at myself for procrastinating, anxiety about feeling incapable of fulfilling some of my duties, and worried I would not make a deadline. Many issues came up, especially related to feeling guilty about things that I had said to people during an argument, and feeling afraid of what others thought of me when I said them. I also ended up thinking, or worrying, about the future because my job situation is somewhat unstable. Fear, guilt, and anger all arose, but being able to bring my attention back to the breath really helped me to loosen my attachment to these emotions and provide some distance and perspective.
In fact, I learned before starting the meditation that the best approach is to allow the thoughts to rise,...
At first I did not really understand how to do this, but after a few minutes I was able to let things go without becoming anxious or upset that my mind kept wandering. I thought about everything from how hungry I was to what I would be eating for dinner, to what I looked like and wanted to do with my hair. Never did I feel "empty" or that my mind was at total peace, but I did use the meditation as an opportunity to become "mindful" about what I think about consciously and subconsciously throughout the day.
I realize now more than ever that even when I am not meditating, all of these thoughts and worries are lingering in my subconscious. I believe that these underlying thoughts and emotions can be detrimental to my sense of well-being and even to my productivity because they can be distracting. If I am having trouble concentrating, it might be because of these types of worries or concerns that I noticed when in the meditation. In the future, I might write down some of the issues, thoughts, and emotions in my head as I am meditating or throughout…
