Her face had seen the god of the mountain, but she was not ready
for the encounter yet. In her delusion, Orual also says "Why must holy
places be dark places?" which is a reflection on her misunderstanding of
the nature of the gods and of holiness in general (Lewis 259). Orual is
not in touch with the actual positives of god and spirituality, and thus
needs to improve her relationship with the gods.
Ultimately, however, Orual succeeds in conversion. She succeeds in
realizing her errors. She is able to lift the veil from her face and
sacrifice herself. "I never wished you well, never had one selfless though
of you," Orual maintains thus showing her self realization (Lewis 317).
She realizes how she has treated people wrong and has not had a proper
outlook on life. The veil is a symbol covering her face, and only if she
removes it can she gain salvation. Visions help Orual to understand,
however, and this means that maybe she did not convert on her own. Perhaps
the divine helped her. And surely she could not succeed in conversion on
her own because it required selfless action towards some one else, in this
case her sister Psyche who she treated so badly earlier in life. But in
the end, it is reflection on her own relationship to the gods, towards
others, and in her own actions that one truly can convert towards the true
spiritual path. Lewis makes it clear that in this conversion process love
is the most important thing. It must be self less love for others and
willingness to do whatever it takes. Only then can one reach salvation and
can one be beautiful, for even someone as ugly as Orual reaches beauty once
she is able to convert.
Orual's conversion, and her own struggles with the divine, is
reflective of the challenges humans must overcome to discover God. To find
God, one must first find God in him or herself. Only through finding the
divine inside, can one truly discover...
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