Freudian and Jungian Dream Analysis: Infidelity in "All the Little Loved Ones" by Dilys Rose

"All the Little Loved Ones" by Dilys Rose clearly functions as an introverted type of art form based upon its structure and presentation: it is a stream-of-consciousness narration whereby the mother of several small children talks about her life directly to the reader. Little happens in the short story on a physical level and the details she narrates are mundane. The primary plot point of the story is the narrator's contemplation of an affair with a man she has met in a park where she takes her children. The children enjoy the swings; she enjoys the outdoor freedom and the idea of something that liberates her from the chains of motherhood. Yet it is unclear whether this liberation is real or imagined: Rose suggests that it does not matter, and that this type of suburban dreaming is perhaps the only viable coping mechanism for an otherwise untenable reality.

The prospective affair clearly has an emotional reality for the woman. The narrator notes of a particularly dreary evening spent with her husband: "tonight, I couldn't even manage my usual…A strange, suspicious little duet would begin in the midst of preparing the dinner and I know where this edgy, halting tune leads, I know the notes by heart" (Rose 80). The prospect of something larger, something more meaningful than her current life haunts her even while she is going through the motions of being a good wife and mother and being faithful to her husband. This sharp discrepancy between the physical and the mental is what makes this a story about 'dreaming' rather than reality.

This 'dream' can clearly be read as an act of Freudian wish fulfillment. The introverted nature of the woman's monologue means that we never actually gain access to the perspective of the man with whom she is contemplating an affair. It is completely possible that he sees their interactions as merely an ordinary part of taking out his children for recreation and that he too is glad to see someone other than small children while engaged in this chore. But for the woman, given the lack of excitement in her life and her failure to communicate with her husband, these brief interactions take on something of much greater significance. However, the significance is masked to the dreamer.

According to Freud, "Freud insists that all dreams are fulfillments of wishes. He argues against the idea that dreams may primarily be concerned with the solution to an intellectual problem, for instance, or with representing a 'worry', or an 'intention', or some other mental product. Even when Freud allows the possibility of anxiety dreams or 'punishment dreams', he still incorporates these within the category of 'wish'. There is something fundamental for Freud about the 'wish'." ("Theory: Freud and dreams, part 2," The Freud Museum.). The actual impulses of the woman may not be desire for another man but simply a desire to escape her current situation -- perhaps for a divorce, or that her husband and children would simply disappear.

The narrator cannot articulate this to herself, much less her husband, however, so instead she contemplates an affair. She worries about an affair, desires an affair, and may even desire to punish her husband for his lack of regard for her and the meaningless nature of their everyday conversation. She reassures him night after night that things are fine, that the meals he cooks are acceptable, even decent, but like food itself, sexuality in her view must be better than just mediocre, better than simply 'good.' "The stomach too has longings for more than simply to be filled" (Rose 80).

Having an affair, according to Freudian analysis, would neatly solve her desire to be rid of the marriage. If discovered, her husband might leave her, taking the children, this 'solving' the problem of her lack of desire for him, her sexless marriage, and her lack of enthusiasm about motherhood. The impulse of her id is desire for something different and is transformed by the woman's ego into a desire for a particular person and escape. However, the superego negates this desire of total escape and instead the impulse becomes a dream.

Jungian analysis, however would view these characters as archetypes rather than as unique characters in and of themselves. Interestingly enough not only is the woman unnamed but so is her husband and children. This intensifies the dream-like quality of the short story. The woman has an 'everywoman'-type quality, particularly...

Quite frequently, the woman says relatively generic things that most women say such as "I love my kids. My husband too, though sometimes he asks me whether I do, asks the question do you still love me" (Rose 79).
One of the most socially unacceptable things a woman can say is that she is uncertain if motherhood was the right choice for her and that she regrets having children and marrying the husband of her children. The fact that her husband questions her repetition of these cliches suggests deep unhappiness on the part of the narrator (which is reflected in her impulses towards infidelity in the heart, if not in actual, physical practice). Her unhappiness is obvious to her husband; otherwise he would not question it. This is an archetypally unhappy couple being torn apart by the stresses of suburban parenthood, but they are unable (once again, stereotypically) to question these norms and the idea they should always be happy together as a perfect couple.

According to Jung, all of us have a kind of collective unconsciousness: "the ego represents the conscious mind while the personal unconscious contains memories, including those that have been suppressed. The collective unconscious is a unique component in that Jung believed that this part of the psyche served as a form of psychological inheritance. It contains all of the knowledge and experiences we share as a species" (Cherry, "Archetypes"). For example, every person exhibits a constant, warring tension between the forces of the 'persona' and the 'animus' or 'anima.' The persona is the mask we assume to the outside world. "The persona represents all of the different social masks that we wear among different groups and situations. It acts to shield the ego from negative images. According to Jung, the persona may appear in dreams and take a number of different forms" (Cherry, "Archetypes"). In the case of "All the Little Loved Ones," the persona of the narrator is that of the perfect wife and mother, supremely confident and content. Our society idealizes women who put their own needs second to their families and makes them feel guilty for satisfying their desires, particularly if they have children.

Children are supposed to be 'number one' for a couple, not sexual fulfillment, but particularly for women. That is why such horror is expressed when women commit crimes that hurt their children, or even when women simply leave their children because of divorce or the need to work. In the story, the narrator is clearly focused on something besides children and feels frustrated that she has no sexual space to articulate her desires with her husband or her desired lover. In fact, it could even be argued that the creation of the other man is actually the projection of her husband, the man she cannot have as a truly sexual being and still be seen as a good, asexual wife and mother and maintain her exterior persona. There is a constant tension between her outer self and dialogue and her inner self and dialogue. "Practice makes perfect, up and down the same old scales," she notes, as if her conversation with her husband were a performance played by rote or lines read from a script, rather than a spontaneous expression of love (Rose 80).

It should also be noted that Jung was extremely influential in the development of the concept of 'interiority' or the contrast between introverted and extroverted personas. Introversion/Extroversion is one of the 'big five' in terms of personality trait continuums, and one of the defining mark of any personality is often said to be its relative introversion vs. extroversion. In the case of this narrator, although she is not necessarily introverted, the evolution of her story before the reader has a highly introverted quality, and the most interesting aspects of her life are taking place beneath the surface. This highlights the relative importance of the 'dream world' overall for Jung. Jung insisted that the collective unconscious was just as an important influence upon the psyche as immediate external events, which is demonstrated in this story. Even if no affair takes place, the intensity with which the woman feels alienated from her so-called real life highlights the important of the introverted aspects of the personal world outside the self. For the woman, the imaginary life she leads is far more potent, important, and influential than what most would call her 'real' existence.'

An introverted person is often…